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Adopted, yet judged an outsider
Sunday, May 28, 2006
By JEFF GAMMAGE
KNIGHT RIDDER NEWSPAPERS
Phil Bertelsen grew up as the biracial, adopted son of white parents, and there was never a day he didn't feel their profound and enveloping love.
The problem, he said, began when he walked out his front door.
At 13, the white classmate he thought was his girlfriend told him: "Mother doesn't want me going out with n------."
"I didn't know at the time what that was," Bertelsen said, "let alone that it might be me."
But when he tried to connect with black people, "I was tormented and ridiculed," he said. "I certainly wasn't aware there was a style of behavior or dress or a code of conduct associated with being black."
Bertelsen, 39, was raised in Highland Park. Today, he is a documentary filmmaker who defines himself through his work, including the autobiographical "Outside Looking In: Transracial Adoption in America."
"I don't think white families should be able to adopt children of any race with impunity," said Bertelsen, who lives in New York.
Families must be ready to incorporate their new child's culture into their lives, he said. When race and adoption meet, "it's not just about the family unit," he said. "It's a lot of things."
Adoption today is a rainbow of color and country; thousands of multiracial families are created in the United States each year by the arrival of children from countries such as China, Guatemala, India and Liberia.
Yet it's the pairing of African-American children and white parents that stokes the transracial debate and sometimes provokes legal battles.
Why? The answer, experts say, is slavery, the country's primal wound, the issue that has tormented black-white relations for more than three centuries.
Though white people might view interracial adoption as evidence of societal progress, experts say, for many black people it is a painful harkening back to a time when their ancestors were treated as property -- and proof that the child-welfare system discourages African-American adopters.
"The race issue gets played out right through adoption," said Joseph Crumbley, a family therapist who studies the issue.
In this country, Crumbley and others say, it's hard to be an adopted child, harder to be a transracial adoptee of any color and hardest to be an African-American child in a white family. Love may be colorblind, but society is not.
Sometimes, it seems the debate over race and adoption grows so loud that the children who walk America's racial fault line go unheard.
Rodney Williams is almost 30, but in some ways his life hasn't changed since he was a boy.
"People still call me an Oreo, because of the way I talk," he said softly.
Williams, who is African-American, was adopted by a white couple three days after his birth. He grew up in Valley Forge, Pa., and other Philadelphia suburbs.
Shari Draayer, Rodney's mother, says she started out "determined there would be no difference in our family."
She adopted more children of different races and built a diverse network of friends and interests. Martin Luther King's birthday became a celebration of the civil rights pioneers who had made their family possible.
"I don't know if Rodney ever saw it that way," said Draayer. "There were times I felt so impotent. ... No matter how much I read or how many friends I have, I still don't know what it's like to be a black man in America."
Society's reaction
Draayer said she encountered white landlords who agreed to rent to her -- then balked upon meeting her children. Black social workers told her that having African-American children was "the new slavery."
But, she said, she also met many thoughtful people, black and white, who cared not a whit about the race of her 11 children. Most important, said Draayer, a high school teacher, is that her children are growing up as caring individuals who treat people of all races with respect.
The rewards of being a transracial family, she said, "far exceed any of the dilemmas or more painful things."
Her son disagrees. Williams, a manager at a Los Angeles hospital, is still searching for where he fits in.
"Black people think I'm arrogant, because I talk 'proper,' " he said. "White people? 'You're not like most black people.' That's what I get."
As for transracial adoption, "I don't think it's a good thing," he said. "You're already adopted, and then you add on top of that being a different race?"
Bertelsen says he felt -- and feels -- fortunate to have been adopted. (His parents, who also adopted two Korean children, declined to be interviewed for this article.)
At the time, he was nearly 5 and lived in a black foster home. At first, in his new family and mostly white neighborhood, he was confused. As an adolescent, he associated with white people.
As he grew, "I was no longer the cute biracial child. I was a young black male, and that was threatening to some people." By college, he identified himself as African-American.
Over time, he said, he has become less strident. He's about to marry a woman who is half-Japanese and half-Hawaiian.
"I feel a lot richer for having had a multiracial family. Absolutely," Bertelsen said. "It helps me in my work. And I kind of 'get it' on some level."
[color="White"].-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"A careful study of anti-semitism prejudice and accusations might be of great value to many jews,
who do not adequately realize the irritations they inflict." - H.G. Wells (November 11, 1933)
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Posted : 31/05/2006 3:18 am
Topic starter
http://www.transracialabductees.org/
Why Transracial?
We think this word sucks, but we like it better than interracial, interethnic, international, or intercultural. We chose transracial because 1) we think it will help people who are thinking about the racial politics of abduction find this website, 2) "trans" can describe a crossing or transfer from one racial setting to another, and 3) "trans" can be used to talk about a crossing or transfer between groups with unequal status and power. We don't like transracial because it doesn't explicitly suggest racism. What we'd like to say is transracist, but then people probably wouldn't find us.
Why Abduction?
Abduction is the word we like better than adoption. "Adoption" conceals the unequal power between abductors and abductees, and in the abduction industry in general.
Who Can Be An Abductor?
White people, white governments, the abduction industry.
Why Talk About This?
It's important to talk about this because nothing else we've seen out there is politicized in this way. Transracial abduction is secretive, silencing, and abusive, and it's really hard for transracial abductees to speak out against this racist system of forced assimilation and brainwashing. We wanted to create a forum where abductees can talk about our experiences and share our analysis of them.
Disclaimer: We don't claim to know everything, or even one thing. This is just us talking about our experiences, and we realize that other abductees have different situations, experiences, feelings, etc. We don't claim to speak for everyone.
Brought to you by some gook-kook named "Emi":
Eminism.org is the web site for Emi Koyama, the activist/author/academic working on intersex, sex workers' rights, (queer) domestic violence, genderqueer, anti-racism, and other issues.
[color="White"].-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"A careful study of anti-semitism prejudice and accusations might be of great value to many jews,
who do not adequately realize the irritations they inflict." - H.G. Wells (November 11, 1933)
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Posted : 31/05/2006 3:27 am
Clusterfuck is putting it mildly.
"Uh, I'm looking to adopt, I mean abduct, a transracial, uh, I mean a transracist, uh....oh, hell, I WANT A CLUSTERFUCK FAMILY."
How fucked is that???????
Posted : 31/05/2006 3:44 am
You know Jim (my God! what hours we keep!) there was a local case many years ago of a Korean era vet who legally adopted a Korean boy and brought him to the small town of Hinton, West Virginia. At the time, the local newspapers and all the local wags hailed this guy (I don't remember his name) and the Korean boy whose nick-name was Skippy as the holy grail of Korean/American relations at the time. Several years later, (20?) people began to ask what ever happened to Skippy. I don't remember all the details, but it seems that one of the two (the GI?) died penniless and alone and the guy Skippy disappeared and was never heard of again. I don't remember all the precise details of this adoption, but I promise to contact some people and do some research on this particular case. In the close knit hills of southern WV this was an earth shaking event that everyone was much in favor of because it was so unique in its compassion. Just goes to show that White people can be compassionate, yet those to whom we show compassion throw it back in our faces calling us weaklings and worms.
As I said, this is an old story of local interest, yet it serves as a prime example of the results of inter-racial adoptions. Let me dig around for a few days and I will get back to you.
If anyone else here knows of this story, let us hear your two cents' worth.
If it weren't for me, where would I be?
Posted : 31/05/2006 4:00 am
No matter how much I read or how many friends I have, I still don't know what it's like to be a black man in America."
Jesus H fucking Christ. What a brainwashed cunt. I sometimes wonder if things can get anymore hopeless...
But, she said, she also met many thoughtful people, black and white, who cared not a whit about the race of her 11 children.
Thoughtless idiots, more like. "Thoughtful people" understand the reality of race and the statistical probability that inhabiting areas with large populations of niggers is dangerous to one's health.
"It's about time for those of us still capable of thinking tribally to begin doing so." - WLP
Posted : 31/05/2006 4:33 am
[
At 13, the white classmate he thought was his girlfriend told him: "Mother doesn't want me going out with n------.""I didn't know at the time what that was," Bertelsen said, "let alone that it might be me."
But when he tried to connect with black people, "I was tormented and ridiculed," he said. "I certainly wasn't aware there was a style of behavior or dress or a code of conduct associated with being black."
Even for a nigger, this buck wasn't too bright...
Posted : 31/05/2006 4:45 am
Seems it's all right to object to race-treasonous adoption (I'm sorry, "transracial") if it's for Black interests, not for White interests. "The new slavery," yeah.... WHITES mentally enslaved, so they'll bring up the spawn of the BLACKS and not their own kind. Reminds me of that bird that destroys the eggs of other birds and puts its own eggs in their place.
And what is "genderqueer"? Trying hard, but I just can't place that particular nuttiness.
Posted : 31/05/2006 3:18 pm
Kind of like FrankenStein going into the village Pub for a few dozen
beers with the locals.
Just on more NIGger Monster in the shape of a Human.
It seems that interracial adoption is no less that Up-Grading
the status of the Family Pet you own.
NiggaBeasts, Jews, Muds, Incinerator Fuel
Posted : 01/06/2006 12:35 am
This article makes it sound as if black kids are in high demand. yeah right. The reason blacks are placed with whites is because there are tons of unwanted nigger kids and not enough decent blacks to take them. A lot of these white couples who adopt a black kid do so because they want to feel like some great humanitarian and show the world how "color blind" they are.
FKA, Hitler Goddess, Starr
Posted : 01/06/2006 1:10 am
Topic starter
This article makes it sound as if black kids are in high demand. yeah right. The reason blacks are placed with whites is because there are tons of unwanted nigger kids and not enough decent blacks to take them.
Ever notice that Whites adopt and blacks take in foster kids?
A cynic might surmise that this is a direct result of the foster
kids arriving along with the promise of a monthly government
paycheck. Good thing I'm not cynical, eh. 
[color="White"].-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"A careful study of anti-semitism prejudice and accusations might be of great value to many jews,
who do not adequately realize the irritations they inflict." - H.G. Wells (November 11, 1933)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted : 01/06/2006 2:27 am
I think transracial adoptions are sick. Every time I see these do-gooder whites with a Guatemalan or Asian kid, I just shake my head, and I think it all started in Vietnam with the 'baby-lift', bringing all those Vietnamese here. I remember Gerald Ford with some Vietnamese kid in his arms, and now we have Angelina Jolie with her two. Complete, utter racial suicide. And it's almost a fad. In the 70's we had pet rocks. Now we have pet adoptees.
Posted : 01/06/2006 9:22 am
I wonder what the difference in cost is (with inflation and all), between buying a black slave back in the 1700-1800's, and "adopting" a non-white nowadays.
"At every door-way,
ere one enters,
one should spy round,
one should pry round
for uncertain is the witting
that there be no foeman sitting,
within, before one on the floor." -Odin, from the Hávamál (Olive Bray's translation)
Posted : 01/06/2006 10:59 am
I think transracial adoptions are sick. Every time I see these do-gooder whites with a Guatemalan or Asian kid, I just shake my head, and I think it all started in Vietnam with the 'baby-lift', bringing all those Vietnamese here. I remember Gerald Ford with some Vietnamese kid in his arms, and now we have Angelina Jolie with her two. Complete, utter racial suicide. And it's almost a fad. In the 70's we had pet rocks. Now we have pet adoptees.
The hymiewood stars have made it trendy to adopt a pet nigger or mud.
Hail Jeboo!
Posted : 01/06/2006 11:04 am
This article makes it sound as if black kids are in high demand. yeah right. The reason blacks are placed with whites is because there are tons of unwanted nigger kids and not enough decent blacks to take them. A lot of these white couples who adopt a black kid do so because they want to feel like some great humanitarian and show the world how "color blind" they are.
I dont think its fair for you to generalize on all whites, assuming that you personally don't know any whites with adopted children from another country. Its a moving experience to see how some of those children live and for many their ethnic backround just isnt the issue. I don't think its about being a "humanitarian" but raising a child.
Posted : 01/06/2006 7:12 pm
I dont think its fair for you to generalize on all whites, assuming that you personally don't know any whites with adopted children from another country. Its a moving experience to see how some of those children live and for many their ethnic backround just isnt the issue. I don't think its about being a "humanitarian" but raising a child.
What? Are you sure you're in the right forum?
We do not support the raising of sub-human scum. We support the expulsion of all members of the NIGger race. Vertically if needs be.
Posted : 02/06/2006 6:55 am
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