This sort of cultural manifestation is a good sign:

http://www.sundaypaper.com/More/Archives/tabid/98/articleType/ArticleView/articleId/4657/Racy-conversations--racists.aspx

I met the most incredible woman a few weeks ago. She’s good-looking, incredibly smart, quirky in an endearing way—I could go on forever about all her wonderful traits. But I have a sneaking suspicion she’s a racist. Some of the things she’s said when we’ve been alone made my skin crawl. I have lots of close friends from different cultural backgrounds, and I can’t imagine bringing them around her after she’s said these things. I’m incredibly disappointed by this troubling turn of events. How do I go about getting over this? What do I say to her? I don’t see myself getting more involved, but I don’t have any real evidence of anything that bad, except for what she’s said.—More Than Skin Deep

This is one of those situations where you gotta go with your gut. And what your gut is telling you is that even if this chick isn’t a raging, all-out racist, there’s something about her character and values that just doesn’t jibe with yours. You don’t need any “evidence of anything that bad” (what do you think you’ll find, for God’s sake? A tall, pointy white hat and noose in her trunk?). Observing her behavior and comments is enough to know this isn’t going to work.

So what do you say to her? You could wimp out and take your pick of tired old lines: The chemistry just isn’t there for you; you’re not ready to settle down; that your mom just bought you the "Family Guy” box set and your DVR is the only thing you’ll be seeing for the foreseeable future. If you’re feeling a bit bolder, tell her those troublesome comments and behaviors—be sure to cite a few—just aren’t sitting well with you. Repeat what you’ve written here—you can’t imagine bringing your friends from different backgrounds around her. That should get your point across without you having to actually say, “I can’t see you anymore because I think you’re a racist.” But if you really want to sack up, that’s the very thing you should say. She probably won’t change, but at least she’ll know that all the “wonderful traits” in the world won’t make up for her being a bigot in the eyes of open-minded fellas such as yourself. In my book, that’s how you get over the disappointment of something like this. SP
Blane Bachelor is an Atlanta-based freelance writer and SP’s resident romance expert. Got a dating dilemma for her to answer? Submit it at http://www.askabachelor.com.